Santa Has an Ignition Interlock – A Christmas Poem from LifeSafer

santa-has-ignition-interlock

Santa has an interlock

Upon his Christmas sleigh.

He got it with a DUI

That came on Christmas day.

 

It happened thanks to all the stress

Of making Christmas toys.

There were so many on the list

For all those girls and boys!

 

He had a drink, and then a few

And then put three more down.

He felt so fine when it was time

To drive his sleigh to town.

 

His reindeer knew the route and so

It started pretty well.

But then he started veering off,

And once he almost fell.

 

And Dasher said to Prancer, “Hey,

This guy has got me scared!

It’s not a good idea to drive

A sleigh while you’re impaired.”

 

Police Flashing LightsA trooper saw the sleigh and felt

That Santa had been drinking.

He watched him weaving through the sky and said,

“What is he thinking?”

 

The trooper stopped the sleigh and pulled

Out Santa to be tested.

“I must deliver all the toys!”

The man in red protested.

 

But Santa didn’t pass the test

He wasn’t going free.

The breathalyzer did its job  –

He blew a 1 point 3!

 

They booked poor Santa, fined him too

His plans were all confounded.

He couldn’t give away the toys –

His sleigh had been impounded!

 

That was but a year ago, and

This year Santa’s out.

He’s driving and he’s sober

And he’s glad, without a doubt.

 

ignition interlock

Before he starts his Christmas sleigh

To glide upon the snow

He blows into an interlock

Which says, “you’re good to go!”

 

And that’s the gift he gives himself

As Christmas rolls around.

His old ignition interlock

Will keep him safe and sound.

 

If you are driving on this eve

Or on the Christmas morning,

Remember Santa’s DUI

And heed his timely warning.

 

You never need to drink and drive

You always have a choice

There always are alternatives,

For that you can rejoice!

 

Don’t drink and drive, it doesn’t pay

To flout the traffic laws.

And if you doubt our word on this

Just check with Santa Claus.

 

Happy Holidays from LifeSafer!